Vantasm: noun. An object, person, or situation that clearly exists, but the children say otherwise.
10:30am, Monday morning. Philosopher Child was at school, Viking Toddler was playing quietly, and I was catching up on housework. After a quick pick-up of all the rooms in the house, a quick mop, doing the dishes, cleaning the bathrooms, and putting in a load of laundry, I was going through lunch options in my mind.
We had pizza a few days before, and the there was a slice left over. (Yeah, yeah, I know how bad pizza is for you, especially since I'm trying to shed a few pounds, but this place has epicly awesome pizza.) Viking Toddler started asking for it at about 8:30am.
"[Viking Toddler]! Are you hungry?" I asked at 10:30. "Do you still want that pizza? Or a sandwich?"
And then came the reply from my little guy. "[Viking Toddler]'s not here!"
Oh. Um, that's new.
"OK," I replied, not quite sure what else to say. "Let me know when he gets back."